I finally went about setting up a flickr account, and this was the first thing I uploaded — a poster advertising “painless, non-scarring circumcision” that’s been going up in public toilets all over the place lately. I meant to scan this and translate it for Danwei a couple of months ago, but dragged my ass on it and eventually got beaten out by Ichabod, who posted his own translation, on which I’ll refrain from commenting as I’ve taken some liberties in my own quick and dirty translation below — most notably the rhyme for ‘Korea.’
Foreskins and penises vary in length –
Like all physical features – from person to person.
Jobs, studies, and overwork all sap your strength
And then illnesses come, causing matters to worsen.
Strange odors and red growths are commonly seen —
The problem? Your foreskin’s as long as a tortilla.
Alas! Alack! What’s a guy to do?
Dongda Anus and Intenstine Hospital will see you through
With its circular slicing techniques from Korea.
No pain! No scarring! Critics cheer!
Your embarrassing ailments all will disappear —
And your partner of the opposite sex will smile from ear to ear.
Where is this Dongda Hospital?
Over to the south of Landao Shopping.
8563-9299; give a call
For health and happiness unstopping.